I Am a Master Chef

So I've been making some seriously delicious food lately, and I decided that I would share my recipes with you.

FURST:
Rice Goes to Bollywood

De Rice:
1. Get a box of Basmati Rice
2. Take the measurements for water from the box, and replace it with 2 parts coconut milk, and 1 part water
3. Pour liquids and rice into a pot.
4. Add about a teaspoon of
        -curry powder
        -red pepper flakes
        -1/2 tsp of onion powder
5. Bring to a boil, stirring often and then cover and reduce to a simmer for as long as the box tells you to.
While your rice is cooking, start the other ingredients. When your rice is done, remove from heat and put off to the side for later.

De Eggz
1. Take about a tsp of olive oil and scramble 2-3 eggs in it.
2. Remove from heat and put them in a bowl for later.

De Vegs.
1. 1/4 cup of
        -red peppers
        -carrots*
        -chopped string beans
        -peas
2. 1-2 chopped chilis
*try to use frozen carrots so that when you thaw them, they will be soft and will cook faster
2. Put your veggies into your frying pan
3. Add about a tablespoon or more of olive oil,
        -2 tsp curry powder
        -1 more tsp of red pepper flakes
        -tsp of crushed garlic
        -tblsp of soy sauce
        - the LIIIITTLEST splash of sesame oil
        -a PINCH of cinnamon
4. Fry the veggies in this delicious sauce concoction until they are about half cooked, then add the rice, and then finally the eggs.
5. Mix together and put in a bowl and ENJOY THE CRAP OUT OF IT!

There are no pictures of the finished product because my boyfriend really likes coconut curry rice, but this is the type of rice I used. I realize it's not basmati, but this stuff only costs a dollar at the Fresh Grocer, and I use the packs of seasoning to fry vegetables for OTHER things. Smart.


SECUND:
The Incredible Mash

1. Chop up about 4 cups of potatoes so they are all reasonably the size of your nose.
2. Put them in a pot and fill that pot with water until the water just barely covers the top of your tatoes.
3. Add a few shakes of red pepper flakes, garlic salt, and pepper.
4. Bring to a boil and cook until you can poke a fork through your potatoes like they was buttah.
5. Remove from heat, strain, and put back in your pot so it stays warm.
6. Add more red pepper flakes to your preference, add more garlic salt and NO more pepper.
7. Add about a cup of sour cream, a few spoonfuls of cream cheese, and a few splashes of milk
8. MIX DAT AWL UP and mash your tatoes guuuud.
9. Eat that delicious motherfucker and enjoy how amazing you are.
10. NOW THERE ARE TEN STEPS!

Mmmmmmm Potatoes.